Monday, February 1, 2010

Formulas of Friendship

This is a way offbeat post which some people might not like, but oh well, here's to life, and friendship (in deed) - Cheers!
I was talking to a friend about the difficulties I face as an individual in social interactions. I feel that one of the strongest and most important relationships one has in life is friendship. I was asking him to give me the formulas of friendship. What should one add to make one feel happy? What to subtract to tease one? How to multiply the mutual love and respect and how to exponentiate the fun one has with one's friends. He gave me three universal 'things-to-do' one can adopt, but told me that there are no formulas of friendship-
1. Smile, it makes others like you ... (and maybe, you start liking others when they reciprocate your smile). It also makes you appear much more approachable than if you were to have a serious face. TRUE THAT
2. Remember people's names. According to my friend (I agree with him), the single word in the dictionary that everyone in this world finds the sweetest, and would love to hear is their name.
3. Its not (always) about you. Well, I mean, really, come on. How true is that? I think one of the most underlined points about friendships (or maybe any relationship for that matter) is that one seeks to learn from the other person's experience. The reason that the friendship exists is that there is a discussion involved, and there is a back and forth of thoughts and ideas (and really, there's nothing like a one-sided discussion). So Its not always about you. And according to my previous post on learning, if learning has to happen, one has to listen. So more often than not, its not about you, or maybe it is about you, you're the one who is learning.